Friday, December 24, 2010

The Bad Boy: An Analysis

In my group of friends I am the only one who likes romance. I'm the only one who cares that Chuck and Blair maybe/kind of got together on Gossip Girl. I'm the only one who cares if Brennan seems jealous of Booth and Hannah, or if Jules and Grayson will stay together until the end of the season. Personally, I could discuss any of these issues at length (you guys hear my Chair rants often enough to know that).

So, this week, when one of my friends came over, I decided it was the perfect time to educate her with my favourite romantic movies. First, we watched the absolute classic, Love, Actually. Oh the romance. I mean, first of all, we have these two:

He's so sweet, with the cards! They may not have had a happy ending, but I still like them

And, of course, I had to show her these two:

There love story was bittersweet, but I loved it too.

And we can't forget these love birds, even if I'm not the Biggest Hugh Grant fan in the world:

She's so adorable! And he's so sweet!

And, the porn stars, who I love, love, love, love:

Such a strange set up, but such a sweet ending

And last, but not least, one of the most beautiful love stories I've ever witnessed:

He speaks English; she speaks Portuguese. And yet, they understand each other. True love.

We were going to watch The Notebook next, since, you know, it's the greatest romantic film of all time (if anyone just protested that I direct them to this video. Wasn't I right?). But, my friend wanted to watch One Week, one of her favourite movies, so I agreed. But only with one caveat. We had to watch the Pacey-Joey sex episode of Dawson's Creek. That might of seemed kind of random. So, let me explain.

You see, my friend here is a HUGE Fringe fan. She claims to be in love with Joshua Jackson, who, coincidentally, is the star of One Week:

He also, coincidentally starred in a little series called Dawson's Creek, where he played bad boy Pacey to James Van Der Beek's mopey loser Dawson and Katie Holmes's innocent little Joey Potter. Now, my friend here had never seen Dawson's Creek (I know! Can you believe it? No Love, Actually, no Notebook, no Dawson's Creek? What kind of life has she been leading?!?!?) How could my friend claim that she was in love with Mr. Joshua Jackson if she had never seen Dawson's Creek? Everyone knows that's the show that made him awesome. Everyone knows that Pacey Witter is the best bad boy of all time.

So, of course I had to make her watch an episode. I selected the one where they go on the ski trip (aka the one where Joey loses her virginity to Pacey instead of Dawson, in the scandal of the century), for a few reasons. First, it featured Pacey and Joey, meaning that Joshua Jackson would get a lot of screen time. Second, it showed Pacey being really sweet and romantic, which I always enjoy. And, third, it showed JJ without his shirt on. I thought I'd throw my friend a bone.

Because I had already seen the episode I had a lot of time to think. I started considering the whole bad boy archetype (and I know what you're thinking right now: all of that, up until now, and she's finally getting to the main point she introduced in the title? Bear with me, please. I'm sorry). It's usually not my thing. I don't generally like bad boys. And I know what you're thinking again (I'm a mind reader!): what? Katherine spends practically every waking hour obsessing over Chuck Bass, and she claims she doesn't like bad boys? Is she insane?

Well, I don't really have an answer to that. So, just go with me. I'll give you some examples. Mostly from Simone Elkeles books, because all she writes about are bad boys, most of which I don't like (which is why I should stop reading her books! But they're so addictive! Help me!). For instance, there's the whole Leaving Paradise/Returning to Paradise thing:

I don't remember the guys name, but I do remember that he's a complete jerk to Maggie (I'm not sure of her name, either, but I'll go with it). He embarrasses her in front of the whole counseling group. He says really, really mean stuff to her. He kisses her just to mess with her. He's distant. He's cruel. He's a bad boy, with no good side. Why, oh why, would she go out with him?

And then there's Alex from Perfect Chemistry, who's a little bit better, and Carlos from Rules of Attraction who's a little bit worse. All bad boys, that, god help me, I hope I never have to date. I don't really see the allure of a bad boy anyway. Who wants to date a guy who smokes or drinks or gets arrested all the time? Even Jess Mariano, my favourite Gilmorian boy was a terrible boyfriend to Rory. Yeah, his kisses were hot (though, again, with the smoking!):

But he was always so irresponsible, always so stupid. And, in the end, he just abandoned Rory. Just left town. Complete jerk. I've never been Team Dean, but I am in that respect. Jess may have been smarter and more interesting and fun (not to mention attractive and a better actor), but none of it mattered since he was such a bad boy that he couldn't even say goodbye to his girlfriend that he claimed to love!

And there's always Ryan Atwood from the OC, who had his own problems. Now, I like Ryan and Marissa in the first season. But then all that Chino crap started to happen and I just couldn't watch anymore. I liked Ryan the reformed bad boy, but I didn't like Ryan reverting to his old ways.

Which brings us back to the beginning: Pacey Witter and Chuck Bass. Since I claim to hate bad boys so much how could I adore them both? Well, you see, these aren't just any bad boys. They're special bad boys. They have a bad side, but they also have a good side, that makes me love them . To the outside world they may seem bad, but to their special little ladies (Joey Potter and Blair Waldorf respectively), they are as sweet as pie. Let me explain.

Let's start with Pacey. He tries to be a bad boy, but he's good at heart. He can't escape it. He may talk the talk:

And maybe, sometimes, he may walk the walk:

For any non-Dawson's Creek fans, this photo is representing that whole arc where Pacey was screwing his teacher, dear Ms. Jacobs

Pacey tried so hard to be bad. He slept with anyone and everyone (including that icky Jen Linley, who later died, and, I have to tell you, I wasn't sad about it). He totally failed out of school. He didn't go to university. But even with all that rebellious behaviour he couldn't betray his heart of gold. It was that shining heart that won him Miss Joey Potter:

For her, he couldn't hide his true nature. I mean, he bought her a wall, for heaven's sakes:

And he watched her sleep. And he took her onto his boat. And he always looked out for her, long after they were broken up, because he is just such a nice boy (and because he was still in love with her, but that's another story for another day) (Note: skip to 5:00):

Pacey may want you to think he's a badass. And most of the characters on the show may believe him. But you, me, and Joey Potter know the truth. We know that Pacey Witter is the sweetest badass that ever lived.

In comparison, we have the King of Badasses, the one, the only, CHUCK BASS (isn't his last name just so fitting?). But I'll let him introduce himself:

Now, much like Pacey, Mr. Badass likes to sleep around:

And he's no stranger to illegal, in sundry affairs (namely drugs, drinking, gambling, and prostitution). And he acts like a jerk to most everyone most of the time. But every bad boy has a weak spot, and his is one Blair Waldorf:

Now, of course, Blair is no innocent Joey Potter. Blair lies and steals and cheats. But, when she wants to be, she's still little miss perfect. And Chuck loves all parts of her, even the evil parts (especially the evil parts, when they're scheming together to take someone down. And, I imagine, other times, if you know what I mean). Chuck's love is selfless. He knows that if he admits his love, he'll just hurt her, so instead he just does nice things for her, just because he can, with no concern for himself. And then, when they get together, he's a sweetie pie boyfriend, showering her with gifts,

Basically, Chuck becomes the best boyfriend ever, at least until he sleeps with Raccoon Face Slut (click to see and be scared!), but again, another story, another day (we all forgive him for it, don't worry. On a sidenote in Chuck Bass-Badassary, this the Jenny that he tried to rape in season 1, lest we forget).

So, what do we learn from this girls? BEWARE OF THE BAD BOY. Because, chances are, he'll be like guy-who's-name-I-forget from those stupid Paradise books. Or he'll be like Jess, and then you'll have to sleep with Dean, even if he's married to that stupid Lindsay, who doesn't even want him to go to university. Of course, there's a chance he could be like Pacey or Chuck. But beware. Be careful. Make sure your bad boy has a good side.

And, make sure your friends watch the cheesy 90's shows that their favourite Hollywood hunks used to star in. They contain valuable life lessons. And valid reasons to keep his poster on your wall and kiss it before you go to bed (not that I do that!).

Goodnight kisses for all (and two for Pacey and Chuck fans)

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