Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Katherine: The Definitive Guide



Welcome to the complete guide to all things Katherine (the wonderful author of the acclaimed blog Katherine was Thinking...). Available at all cyber stores near you, this handbook, complete with definitions, pictures, and random facts about Katherine, is all you need to become a Katherine expert in mere minutes. Here is an excerpt from the highly anticipated handbook:

BASIC INFO

Name: Katherine (I know, obvious, but some people just don't get it...)
Nationality: Canadian (I know, I'm cool, eh?)
Age: 16 (you know, smack dab in the middle of those awful teenage years that everyone always complains about)
Gender: Female (Shocking, I know!)
Career: High School Student (yes, people complain about this too. And then they grow up to make movies about it, a la John Hughes)
Favourite Colour: Yellow (like the sun! or a sunflower! or yellow paint!)
Favourite Number: 14 (why? Well, why does anyone ever like any number?)
Favourite Day of the Week: Saturday (because friday? Is so overrated)

INTERESTING FACTS

-97% chance she has a undiagnosed case of OCD (or she's just really, really neurotic. Take your pick)
-Hates fast food (and yes, that includes MacDonald's. And Kentucky Fried Chicken. And Tim Horton's)
-Only reads the Entertainment section of the newspaper (because, really, who cares about world events?)
-Keeps all of her books in alphabetical order, by author, and by publication date. Labels all her binders and bins and pretty much anything she can get her hands on (for explanation see "neurotic", "OCD", above)
-Reads Teen Vogue every single month, though she has no interest in fashion (except Project Runway, of course)
-Keeps a blog (bet you didn't know that!--to see it go here!)

PICTURES

Okay, here's the deal with pictures, just to set everyone straight: They ain't going to happen (don't you love the word ain't? I love the word ain't). I don't want to post pictures of myself. I am magnificently attractive, of course, and just don't want to make other people jealous (ha ha ha). No, I'm just not comfortable posting pictures of myself. Maybe I'll post pictures of my cat. She's much cuter to look at.

To purchase the rest of this guide contact the publisher (Katherine Isawesome) or keeping reading her blog. Updates daily.

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