10 Things I Want to Say to You

I read this on Steph Bowe's blog, who read it on someone else's blog. You know how these things work. A friend of a friend of mine... Hopefully you'll read this and make a list of your own.

Anyways, here are 10 things I'd say to different people in my life, if I was allowed. If I didn't have to be afraid of hurting their feelings, or saying the right thing, or scaring them, or embarrassing myself. If I could say anything I wanted, here's what I'd say to you:

1) You are such a nice person and you have done so much for me. I owe so much to you, but sometimes, it feels like you don't owe me anything, like you don't need me at all. I wish you wouldn't make me feel that way. Do you really want to be my friend?

2) Please, just relax. Let it come to you. We're never going to be best friends. Stop trying so hard, forcing your way in. We need some space. I need some space. Please.

3) You are so arrogant, and I cannot stand it. The worst part is, you have nothing to back it up! You are not that smart! And I hate your writing! It's just plain awful! I wish you would stop showing off in such transparent ways. You are not that smart, just mean and arrogant, and I really hate you for it.

4) I miss you. I miss who you used to be. I think about you everyday, and I wish we could still be friends. I'll always remember you, and love you for who you were. I hope you can be that person again some day. I'll always be proud of you, looking out for you. I hope you get all you've been working for.

5) I am in the IB program! So stop insulting it to my face! Stop insulting my friends, and stop insulting my classmates! I've been the program for 4 years--I obviously see some use to it. When you say all that stuff, I get insulted! It's a personal attack, can't you see that? Stop badmouthing us! It is mean and unprofessional.

6) Thank you. I know we've had some issues, but I'm glad to be able to talk to you everyday. You been such a large part of my high school experience, and such a large part of my life. I've hated you and had so much fun with you and laughed with you and talked about everything with you. I'm glad to have you in my life.

7) I love you and I don't know how I'll ever live without you. I can't think about losing you. You mean the whole world to me.

8) What's wrong with me?

9) What am I doing wrong? Why don't I get to be special? Why don't I get a bing? I am just as good as everyone else! Why won't you notice me?

10) You are a mean person. Shut up. You are cruel, and hurtful, and I hate you. Yes, you made me cry. Many times. Congratulations. You were the biggest jerk then, and you're the biggest jerk now, bringing it up every single time I talk to you. You are such an awful person and I feel bad for anyone who has to live with you or know you. Most of all, I feel bad for you. You're going to have a lonely life, if you don't learn some common decency.